I struggle to maintain a blog. That is evident by the time between my last post and this one and that last post and previous entries. I could say it’s because I am super busy. Too busy focused on more important priorities; career development, private practice building, family, personal relationships, health and wellness, out living and experience life instead of writing a blog. I am focused at times on these things, but I must be honest here with you, the reader and myself; I am not too busy to write a blog. I just struggle with what to write about and how to write it. I don’t mind writing. I did a lot of it in my 6 years in college, but I do not find that it comes easily to me. Or, maybe it does and my real difficulty is in how I judge myself as a writer. The perfectionist in me struggles to value the process of learning and growing; practicing to improve your skill and making mistakes. The counselor in me teaches clients the importance of this process, having self compassion and letting go of the idea that perfect exists in this world. Rather contradictory, wouldn’t you say? Then I remind myself that I am a human being first and foremost, before I impose the perfectionistic expectation and the counselor role. I have lived a flawed life and I have to wake up everyday and work at the internal dialogue I carry around with me as I go about my day. I believe I will work on this my entire life. I have also experienced tremendous improvement in that internal dialogue and the power it can have over one’s sense of self. And I believe I will continue to improve these things until I die. Being human is a messy and beautiful thing. I didn’t become a counselor because I have life “all figured out”. I become a counselor to muddle through this life experience along side my fellow humans. It is important to me that I let others see that I have challenges too. I struggle with allowing myself to be flawed, to not produce perfect blog entries, artwork, clinical assessments and diagnoses, etc….. Today, I tackled that idea of a perfect blog entry straight on and conquered it, because you got to read this! Tomorrow will be another day to continue the challenge.
Mary on Why you’ll find freedom… Amy Ford on Why you’ll find freedom…